blogONEI really think that God has taken this opportunity to really shake me up and realize a few things.
A visiting pastor to my church on Sunday said to the [Chinese] congregation that if certain things/events/actions were according to God’s Will, there would be a decreased amount of restrictions, conflicts etc. Although conflicts natural occur in everything we do, I believe this to be true in my case. I’ve done a little reading and found Ecc 3:1-8 [show] For everything there is a season, and a time for every matter under heaven: [2]a time to be born, and a time to die; a time to plant, and a time to pluck up what is planted; [3]a time to kill, and a time to heal; a time to break down, and a time to build up; [4]a time to weep, and a time to laugh; a time to mourn, and a time to dance; [5]a time to cast away stones, and a time to gather stones together; a time to embrace, and a time to refrain from embracing; [6]a time to seek, and a time to lose; a time to keep, and a time to cast away; [7]a time to tear, and a time to sew; a time to keep silence, and a time to speak; [8]a time to love, and a time to hate; a time for war, and a time for peace.
and Ecc 5:1-7 [show] Guard your steps when you go to the house of God. To draw near to listen is better than to offer the sacrifice of fools, for they do not know that they are doing evil. [2] Be not rash with your mouth, nor let your heart be hasty to utter a word before God, for God is in heaven and you are on earth. Therefore let your words be few. [3]For a dream comes with much business, and a fool's voice with many words. [4]When you vow a vow to God, do not delay paying it, for he has no pleasure in fools. Pay what you vow. [5]It is better that you should not vow than that you should vow and not pay. [6]Let not your mouth lead you into sin, and do not say before the messenger that it was a mistake. Why should God be angry at your voice and destroy the work of your hands? [7]For when dreams increase and words grow many, there is vanity; but God is the one you must fear. (ESV)
Having concern towards or serving in a ministry with all one’s heart is something I believe we are commanded by God to do (I don’t have the Biblical back-up for that command, if it really does exist)…but I don’t think it should’ve reached my level of crazed, rabid frustration several nights ago. I ended up having really wild dreams and didn’t sleep too well, and yesterday I woke up really sick and had to miss my first driver’s ed in-class lesson. I’m clearing up now, and my heart and mind are at a lot more peace now that I’m seeing a new path.
Although we all had some sort of a vision for Asian outreach of some sort, be it an ACF/ACC/whatever, in the end it is really up to God’s timing and plan for us. I now believe that although I felt God had called me to help out in this ministry, I cannot (and perhaps MUST NOT) lay my hands on it until I learn patience, calmness and time management, all towards God and from God, amongst other things. As my parents told me again today, there have been too many times in my past ministry/life experiences where I’ve fully devoted myself to serving, or fully devoted myself in another function, and allowed other parts to suffer.
I stand convicted of these truths and now firmly believe that it is not my time to help serve. I also do not believe that “my decision” will affect Dennis and Gerald’s continued talking and planning for “ACC” (or whatever it becomes).
I look forward to the day that the LORD has planned to call me again to serve, either for CC or “ACC”!
Love in Christ,
Adwin
